


Little Toy Guns

by megsblackfire



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Coping, Hurt/Comfort, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, Other Characters included but not really all that important, implied mchanzo, the dads are fighting and Jesse's caught in the middle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-10-21
Packaged: 2018-08-23 20:03:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8340943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megsblackfire/pseuds/megsblackfire
Summary: Jesse McCree had hoped that returning to Overwatch would make Jack and Gabriel stop fighting. He was wrong. If anything, the fighting has gotten worse and he has to deal with the pain of knowing that they expect him to chose one over the other. No one else on base has the guts to stand up to them, so it looks like it'll fall to him. Does he have the strength to stand up to the two most important men in his life and tell them just what he thinks? If he doesn't, he might just lose his mind.He wishes words were like little toy guns instead of the live rounds that tore through them every time they opened their mouths.





	

Jesse winced as Jack and Gabriel continued screaming at each other. They were holed up in Deadlock Gorge waiting for evac that was taking forever to reach them. The mission had gone sour and they’d lost the payload to an explosion that had almost killed Angela and Hana. Hanzo had managed to alert them all in time for them to beat a hasty retreat, but that didn’t stop “Reaper” and “Solider: 76” from screaming at each other as soon as they were certain that no one was about to die.

“If you had stayed on the damn payload, we wouldn’t have lost it!” Jack snarled.

“Oh, yes, of course it’s my fault,” Gabriel sneered. “The perfect little boy scout couldn’t possibly have made a mistake by NOT CHECKING OUR FUCKING SIX!”

Smoke billowed out of Jesse’s nose and he quickly grabbed his pack of cigarettes. He grumbled out a “need a smoke” before beating a hasty retreat from the room. Jack and Gabriel’s voices followed him out into the night as he mounted the stairs to the veranda. He didn’t want to hear Hana meekly joke about “make-up sex” or Hanzo huff that the former leaders were bad at their job. He didn’t want to hear Angela fretting over anyone, trying to pretend that the fight wasn’t happening as Jack and Gabriel were inches from each other’s throats.

Nothing had changed. Jack and Gabriel had escaped the jaws of death through some fucked up experimentation, but it hadn’t changed them one bit. They were still more willing to fight each other than to think about how their fighting affected the kid that was caught in the middle of their stupid war. Jesse lit the cigarette and let it burn in his hand as smoke billowed out past his lips.

 _“I wish words like little toy guns, no sting, no hurt no one, just a bang, bang rolling off your tongue,”_ he sang softly into the night.

Coyotes danced through the smoke that he exhaled, twisting and yapping at each other as they vanished into the night. He took a deep drag of his cigarette, holding the rancid smoke in his mouth for as long as he could. He hated cigarettes, but that was all they had in the Gorge. He’d accidentally left all his cigarillos in Gibraltar and now he was paying for it. He exhaled the smoke, watching it fade away into the dark.

“The fighting makes you uncomfortable,” Hanzo called from the doorway.

“Can’t tell me you like it, pardner,” Jesse murmured as he stared off across the Gorge.

“I do not enjoy it, but it is affecting you worse than even Dr. Ziegler,” Hanzo said as he leaned on the railing beside him. “Do you wish to talk about it?”

“Didn’t think you were one for touchy-feely stuff,” Jesse teased half-heartedly as he glanced at the archer. “Ain’t really something I like talking about in detail, but if you don’t mind a lil heartache, I can give you the Spark Notes.”

“I have been taking lessons with Zenyatta,” Hanzo chuckled. “It has been helpful for Genji and I to reconcile. I will listen if you need an ear to vent to, McCree.”

“Thanks,” Jesse smiled before he looked up at the star-speckled sky. “Wasn’t always like this. The fighting. That only happened within the last year or so before HQ went sky-high. Used to be that those two could have a civil conversation and never get their voice higher than ‘annoyingly passionate’. Don’t know what changed, but they started yellin’ more all of a sudden. Couldn’t get a civil word between them. Suddenly, Jack couldn’t do anything right and Gabriel was never good enough. Don’t laugh,” he added as he pulled a locket out from under his serape. “It’s the only thing Ana had.”

He flipped the heart-shaped locket open and a holographic picture sprang to life above it. It was a picture of him, Jack, and Gabriel with their arms around each other and grinning widely for the camera. Jesse smiled sadly at the picture and sighed.

“Think that’s the last time Ana could get the three of us in a picture together,” he murmured. “Then everything went to shit. We lost Ana. We lost Jack and Gabe in Zurich. Overwatch got shut down.”

“You left before the explosion,” Hanzo murmured.

“Don’t mean I didn’t have contacts keepin’ me up-to-date on what was goin’ down,” Jesse shook his head.

The lie was easy. No one knew he was in Zurich when the headquarters exploded. No one knew he was there trying to get between Jack and Gabriel with information they could both use. No one knew he died trying to pull Jack from the wreckage. No one knew he was resurrected alongside Jack and Gabriel. No one knew he suffered the same regeneration-decaying situation that they did except for the three of them.

“Was devastated when I thought I lost them in Zurich. They were the only family I had and…fuck,” he wiped at the tears rolling down his face, hoping that Hanzo didn’t see the smoke wafting off of them. “Sorry. They were the only family I had.”

“The fighting…did they put you in the middle of it?” Hanzo asked.

“They did,” he sighed. “Don’t know if they were even aware of it at that point. I was expected to take one side or the other and…how could I? Forcin’ me to choose between them tore me to pieces. One of the many reasons why I left. Hell, I’ve got a fucking list of reasons and that one’s pretty high up there. I needed some time to myself and then…Zurich took them from me. Was alone for six years thinkin’ they were dead and gone.”

“And now they are back and nothing has changed,” Hanzo murmured sadly. “I am sorry, McCree.”

“Ain’t yer fault,” Jesse sighed as he shot a stream of smoke towards the sky. “Just wish they’d stop being fuckin’ pricks.”

“I do as well,” Hanzo murmured as he rested a hand on Jesse’s shoulder.

They stayed out on the veranda in silence until the shuttle arrived to pick them up. They sat as far away from Jack and Gabriel as they could, although the fighting seemed to have simmered down to throwing mean looks at each other. It was better than the yelling, better than feeling himself falling apart piece by piece because all he could think about where flames and fire and death while they screamed.

He figured that it would smooth over when they got back to the Watchpoint. Jack and Gabriel would have some space to put their thoughts in order and it would be business as usual. They’d train and run their exercises and avoid each other.

It wasn’t.

If anything, it got worse. Suddenly, Jack and Gabriel were at each other’s throats over everything. It wasn’t unusual for Jesse to bolt awake in the middle of the night because he heard his adopted fathers screaming at each other, shaking the walls with the force of their anger. Fire danced in the corners of Jesse’s vision and no amount of “smoke breaks” could push them aside.

His hands were shaking almost constantly; Angela thought he had developed some sort of condition from the last mission and ran tests on him. She didn’t like the results that said his nerves were in perfect working order and demanded he stay overnight for observation. It was probably the first good night’s sleep he’d gotten in weeks. He couldn’t hear Jack and Gabe yelling from the medical bay, especially not with the privacy screening up.

“I don’t understand,” Angela grumbled as Jesse pulled his clothing back on. “Everything is checking out just fine; how are you shaking?”

“Lack of sleep,” Jesse laughed. “Don’t worry so much, Ange; I’m fine. One good night’s sleep and I’m right as rain.”

“I would like to keep you longer,” Angela sighed, “but Morrison threw a shit-fit when he found out you were in here and no one had told him.”

“Please tell me he didn’t go after Gabe,” Jesse groaned.

“No, Gabriel backed him up; he didn’t like that he wasn’t informed about your condition either,” Angela shook her head.

“Oh good, they finally stopped fighting,” Jesse snorted as he fished out his pack of cigarillos. “Excuse me; I need to get my fix.”

“Jesse, you shouldn’t,” Angela started to groan, but he had already left.

He walked out of the base and up to one of the raised platforms. He lit up a cigarillo and took a deep breath, holding the smoke in his lungs before he released it. Coyotes danced over one another as the smoke billowed away, closely followed by chicken-hawks and buzzards. He let out a long sigh, slumping across the railing as his smoke billowed out under his clothing and slowly engulfed him, creating coyotes out of the shapeless mass that swirled around him.

 _“I wish words were like little toy guns,”_ he mumbled as he watched the coyotes roll around him playing. _“Just the bang, bang, rollin’ off yer tongue. No smoke, no bullet, no kick from the trigger when you pull it.”_

He heard footsteps behind him and straightened, stuffing the cigarillo in his mouth as the coyotes tumbled out into space. He sucked in three times to get himself up to the proper size before he turned to wave at Hanzo.

“Hey, sugar, what’re you doin’ out here?” he asked with a smile.

“Jack and Gabriel are looking for you,” Hanzo said as he glanced curiously around him. “I thought I heard dogs.”

“Up here?” Jesse laughed as he gestured around him. “Nah; too high up for most of those lil darlin’s. So, what do the gruesome twosome want with me?”

“They were trying to get answers out of Dr. Ziegler, but she would not divulge anything other than you had been discharged and went to have a smoke,” Hanzo frowned. “Evidently, they went to the wrong area to find you.”

“Or they just didn’ care as much as they let on,” Jesse snorted bitterly as he took another drag on the cigarillo. “No big deal. Let ‘em know I’m up here if ya want. Ain’t really in the mood to deal with their bullshit.”

“Perhaps you should,” Hanzo murmured. “No one else seems able to get through to them.”

“They’re grown-ass men; they can handle their own shit,” Jesse snapped before he pinched the space between his eyes. “Sorry, didn’t mean to snap,” he sighed as he put his smoke out. “Fuck. Came out here to relax and those two fuckers are still making me want to tear something’s throat out. Smokin’ just ain’t cutting it anymore.”

“Perhaps some plum wine will suit you better,” Hanzo laughed.

“Hey, if yer buying,” Jesse grinned.

Hanzo laughed as they headed back inside. Unbeknownst to Hanzo, a smoky coyote was trotting at their heels, a sign that Jesse needed to let his anxiety loose in its own way. He did his best to cover the clack of claws on metal with whistling, trying to get Hanzo to join in even though he was laughing at him. The coyote stayed close until they were in the messhall, then it collapsed and drifted down the hallway as dust.

Most of the base was already in having lunch and waved as he and Hanzo sidled up to the bar. A few called out greetings, but most of them were too busy stuffing food into their mouths to bother. Hanzo had just poured them each a glass of plum wine when Jack and Gabriel burst through the doorway snarling at each other. Jesse flinched, pulling his hat down over his eyes as he contemplated downing the strong drink in one gulp and bolting for safety.

“Well maybe if you weren’t riding his ass all the time, he wouldn’t have had a fucking breakdown!” Jack snarled.

“Oh, so I’m the bad guy again?” Gabriel snapped “So unwilling to even contemplate that you’re the problem?”

“You done?” Jesse snarled as he lifted his head. “Cuz I’m pretty sure everyone’s sick of listening to your newest round of bitchin, you stuck-up pair of pricks.”

The whole messhall went silent. He could feel their eyes bouncing from his back to the pair by the door. Jack narrowed his eyes as Gabriel cracked his neck.

“Why didn’t you tell us you were in observation?” Jack demanded. “We were worried.”

“Oh, you were worried?” Jesse asked. “Wow, I’m surprised you managed to feel anything in between trying to tear each other’s eyes out. I mean, it takes up so much of your time and I’m fucking _honoured_ that you could spare a moment for me.”

“Drop the sass, Jesse,” Gabriel growled. “It doesn’t suit you.”

“Why should I?” Jesse demanded. “Y’all won’t drop your little pissin’ contest.”

Jesse fumbled for his pack of smokes and lit one up, ignoring the medics’ infuriated shrieks. He needed an excuse for the smoke billowing out of his nose. Smokes were the only good one he had.

“Y’all are so busy tryin’ to one up each other, y’all don’t notice that we’re sick of it,” Jesse snarled. “And it seems like it falls to Jesse McCree to grow a set of balls and tell you two pissheads what’s going on.” He got to his feet and glared at them. “Yer fightin’ over absolute fuck-all and dragging us into the middle of it. Are you hoping to turn Gibraltar into the next Zurich?”

Jack and Gabriel flinched like he had slapped them. Several people gasped at the tables, covering their mouths in shock. Jesse didn’t care. He was hurting and it was because of them and he didn’t care who was there to hear it. They had to hear this.

“Y’all forget that it was a pointless, stupid argument that spelled our downfall?” Jesse demanded as he stormed over to them. “Y’all forget how many of us suffered because you had yer heads shoved so far up yer ass that yah didn’t care about what happened to us? Cuz I sure haven’t forgotten! I live with that consequence every fuckin’ day!”

Jack bowed his head. “Jesse, I didn’t….”

“No, you didn’t know,” Jesse snarled. “You were too busy blaming Gabriel to notice what it was doing to the rest of the team. You didn’t even care about what it was doin’ to me! Neither of you did! I died every time you two started screaming! EVERY FUCKING TIME!”

Tears burned hot trails down his face and he didn’t care. He glared at the two men that were supposed to protect him and was happy that they looked devastated. It was high time they started acting like adults and not two spoiled little kids.

“You wanted me to take a side, do you remember that?” he snarled. “Every single time. You’d look at me like I betrayed you if I agreed with Gabe,” he jabbed a finger at Jack, “and you looked ready to deck me if I agreed with Jack. I couldn’t fucking win! You were making me choose between you like a divorced parent pressuring their kid to choose one over the other. How do you think that made me feel?”

They both hung their heads and looked at their feet. Jesse nodded his head and wiped at his eyes.

“Yah, didn’t make me feel too fuckin’ good,” he snapped. “Wish words were like little toy guns, but they ain’t. They cut like a fucking knife, don’t they?”

“Jesse, I’m so, so sorry,” Gabriel whispered.

His claws reached up and Jesse let them push through his hair and knock his hat backwards. Jack caught the hat as it fell and held in against his chest. Tears were rolling down his face as he held the hat close, sniffling as he tried to keep himself together.

“We shouldn’t have put you in the middle,” Jack agreed. “It was wrong.”

“Damn right it was,” Jesse growled. “And yer still doin’ it. I don’t care what happened between you two; learn to fucking communicate without screaming. Yer keepin’ me up at night and it’s fuckin’ with everything.”

“Oh, _m’ijo_ ,” Gabriel murmured as he pulled Jesse close. “I’m sorry.”

Jesse latched onto Gabriel’s shoulders, pushing his face into his father’s chest. Jack closed in behind him, wrapping him in soothing warmth. Black smoke engulfed them, holding them close. Jesse’s gray smoke mingled easily, negating the need for the cigarillo. Jack let out a soft noise against Jesse’s neck as his fingers dug into his shoulders.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I hurt you and I can never take it back.”

“Just stop fighting,” Jesse smiled weakly. “You two used to be really good at having discussions that didn’t result in screamin’. What happened?”

“No idea,” Gabriel sighed. “Maybe we need to see a marriage councillor.”

“You say that as a joke, but it might be necessary,” Jack chuckled.

Jesse laughed softly before they slowly drifted off to a spare table and sat down. They didn’t really need to eat anymore, but it put up a good show for anyone that might be watching.

The next day, their conviction was put to the test. Jesse watched miserably as Jack and Gabriel started arguing about something. It was over something stupid, as per usual, and they were getting dangerously close to each other. Jack’s fist slammed onto the table and he shook as he glared at Gabriel. Very slowly, he closed his eyes and lowered his head.

Jesse almost started crying as Jack started singing softly.

 _“I wish words were like little toy guns, no sting, no hurt no one, just a bang, bang, rolling off your tongue,”_ he sang softly.

Gabriel let out a low laugh before he dropped his head to rest against Jack’s. His hands closed over Jack’s, squeezing gently as he nosed his way under Jack’s jaw.

 _“No pain, no damage done,”_ he sang.

“You missed a line,” Jesse teased.

They both shot him amused looks before quietly apologizing to each other and starting the argument over from the beginning. They raised their voice at a few points, but by the end of it, they closed the conversation with a soft kiss rather than clawed eyes. Jesse would have wept if he wasn’t so happy.

* * *

 

Hanzo climbed up the tower and crouched down. He could just make out the three figures below him. Smoke wafted up from them; black, gray, and white; and shapes and symbols twisted away on the wind. He settled down to watch, smiling as he watched a bright red serape shift across one of the figure’s shoulders.

The serape was carefully peeled off and draped over the railing before Jesse climbed up onto it. Jack’s hand rested momentarily on his back before Jesse jumped. He exploded into gray smoke and twisted down across the rocks to the ground. A gray coyote twisted to yap at Jack and Gabriel, wagging his tail excitedly. Jack and Gabriel exchanged amused looks before they followed Jesse over the railing.

A black jaguar leaped down the rocks, rubbing against the smoky coyote. The long black tail snapped rapidly back and forth as something small and white circled his head. For a moment, Hanzo thought it might have been a dove, but he realized quickly that was incorrect. Instead, a white peregrine falcon flapped around their heads, calling softly into the calm morning air.

Hanzo smiled as he watched the family of wraiths bolt across the compound, leaving the rest of Overwatch behind to enjoy their repaired affections. He wished them the best of luck and quietly promised to keep their secret.

**Author's Note:**

> The explosion in Zurich killed Jack, Gabriel, and Jesse (who no one but the other two knew was there) and they were all reanimated the same way. Essentially, we have three smoke monsters instead of just Gabe.
> 
> Song is "Little Toy Guns" by Carrie Underwood.


End file.
